Cinahilger's Blog



Macaroni and Cheese

I came to Panera Bread to have a cozy place to write, but as soon as I got here I became lost in the ecstasy of mac’n’cheese and a chicken caesar sandwich. Now, with only two bites of each left, do I remember my original purpose in coming here.

This has been an amazing fall break. I got to be with my man, spending many hours in shameless bliss–that’s right, playing videogames. Videogames are something I don’t allow myself do indulge in during the school year because time and experience has taught me that the more videogames I play, the lower my GPA drops. But we had a four-day weekend, and this turned into a blissful holiday of mercilessly killing hundreds as our samurai battled entire armies in feudal China.

On top of that, I had a wonderful Sunday at the best church in town, had a hotdog roast with all my favorite people, and enjoyed a couple of fun-filled hours at a pumpkin patch. And I’m finishing the weekend in panera, indulging in some delicious macaroni and cheese and a little time to write.

Tomorrow I go back to being a stressed-out college student. But for now I’m pretending that this is my life, enjoying fine times with great people, typing away on my clicky-clack keyboard as if these words held any kind of significance. Yes, this is my life, right now in this moment. But lives, it seems, have the tendency to shift and change. They are filled with peaks and valleys, though our perspective on this is limited. Right now I’ll enjoy this little peak, even as I can feel myself slipping over the summit, on the edge of the decline, sliding back toward another week of responsibility and rationality.

Thankfully rationality isn’t a reality but a condition.

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